Rat Tattoo

Yes, you read correctly. I decided to get a rat tattoo. I had been thinking about doing something like that for quite some time (even before my boys died, though I never thought too seriously about it until recently). I had seen some rat art/tattoos that inspired me, but nothing that knocked my socks off.

A little over a month ago, I stumbled across this on Pinterest:

(Try as I might, I could not track down the original posting or the artist. I scoured Pinterest, DeviantArt, and Google and came up empty handed. I hope the original artist will forgive me! This was the only link I found: rat art.)

This one hooked me, so I decided I wanted something similar and I wanted the rats to look like Romulus and Remus, obviously.

Even after the last several months and having new rat babies to love, I still miss them like crazy. They are so often in my thoughts and dreams and always in my heart. Their absence weighs so heavily on me. I would have been happy to have the two of them forever. They were so special and I felt inspired to show that. Plus, I feel like I really am the crazy rat lady, so why not make it official? Extend the crazy, as it were.

So I showed them the above image and sent a few pictures of Romulus and Remus (like I don't have enough, right?) The guy who owns Fallen Owl and did my first two tattoos was, once again, booked through August! (WHAT?!?) And the lady who did my Labyrinth tattoo is no longer at that studio, so Adam (the owner) made a few recommendations for me based on what I wanted and pulled out portfolios. I actually ended up liking the portfolio of a visiting tattoo artist best for this type of thing. So we set up an appointment a couple of weeks out.

That gave me more time to solidify my decision and make sure of the placement. Tattoo placement seems to be the hardest thing for me to decide on and I am amazingly picky. I aim for places that won't wrinkle/stretch too much over time, as well as places that I can cover them up (in case I ever want a job... actually, at my current job, no one cares! Awesome). I had been thinking about my collar bone area. I carried them around on my shoulders so that seemed appropriate. And then I could put it close to my heart. Because I am a cheesy person.

And that was that! I went in Friday before work to have it done. The guest artist who did it was great-very nice and talented. Plus he keeps everything really clean (a must in my world. Fallen Owl always keeps things clean, though). It took not quite two hours and it hurt like the dickens (all of my others were either done in one hour or one hour sessons).

I was happy with the way it turned out. But I couldn't take any good pictures right off because the artist covered it with a special bandage. It was clear, but blood and ink pooled inside of it. It was pretty nasty looking!

So I waited the 24 hours and took off the bandage. Carefully, so as to not get blood everywhere (again, nasty). I washed it and tada!

It obviously needs time to heal (and boy is it tender!), but it looks pretty good, right? I got several compliments on it when I went into work. My kind of people on night shift: nerds with crazy hair colors and tattoos. I feel like I fit in!

I imagine some people will find me very odd for getting my rat tattoo. But I am happy with it! It's a nice reminder of my boys. I love how they are all curled up together. It reminds me so much of how they always curled up together when they were alive. I think that is part of why the original image made such a strong impression.

Now to heal and contemplate future tattoos.

Pet Rats

We all know how much I love(d) my little ratties. I still think about them quite often. Sometimes I get overwhelmingly sad that they are gone, but I also have plenty of good memories.

Babies in a hammock!

Big ratties in a hammock!

I decided that I do want more rats. I think I am starting to get to a point where I will want more soon. I knew I wasn't ready for a long time because every time I thought about getting rats, I couldn't picture having any others but my Romulus and Remus.

I follow several people on both Instagram and Tumblr who are rat owners and lovers. It is so fun to see the pictures and I can't help but think that there are so many other sweet, cool, and cute rats out there that I haven't met yet. That sounds silly, but it has helped me move on from needing to "replace" my rats and to a place where I would like to form new bonds and relationships with other rats.

Do I sound like the crazy rat lady or what?

Big old rats on top of their house.

Baby rats on top of the same house. So tiny!

The point is, I really love rats. I think they are so fun and cute. I like to follow people who have pet rats and see what happens and what things they do together. And I know from experience how much fun rats can be. And I think, sometime in the near-ish future, there will be rats here again. I have started stalking the page of the breeder that I got my boys from, and will probably apply for adoption in a couple of months. I will keep you posted.

Rattie Remembrance

I went to the Facebook page for Mesa Veterinary Hospital here: Mesa Facebook Page and dug up a few treasures.

Remus after his surgery in his collar. Which he hated.

He was a big boy!

Aww, look at this big cutie!

Yep, vet pictures. Gotta love it. My vet sent me a card following Remus's death (actually, following the deaths of all of my critters) and both of his vets wrote nice messages and they included a picture of the gal holding Remus in his collar. Which was so sweet and made me cry all over again.

I miss my ratties. Life is sad without them. I still look over to where their cage was. I catch myself walking towards their table before I remember that there isn't anything there. I don't have to save noodles and snacks anymore. It's just sad and a big adjustment for me. I am so used to worrying about them or thinking about them that it is hard to break that habit. I would give just about anything to have those things back.

I love and miss my rats. I just hope that they are together again and happy.

And Then There Were None

Today my little Remus died. It was very sudden and unexpected. He had been doing really well and acting normally. His appetite was still good and he was still lively and playful. I am not sure if it was a seizure, heart attack, stroke, or what, but it was fast and a little scary. But it was over quickly.

I took this picture of him today, shortly before his episode. I was telling him that he was going to be my witch's familiar for Halloween. He looked unimpressed.

The attack or whatever happened very quickly, but I called the vet to tell them we were coming in because he was having trouble breathing right after. He had stopped breathing by the time my shoes were on, but I ran him to the vet anyway. There was nothing they could do. I was able to say goodbye to him and he will be sent to be cremated.

Such an unhappy, wet rat. But cute.

It's so sad that such great little creatures live so short a time. Despite that, I love little animals and I hope that I will be able to have more rats again one day. It's hard not to fall in love and become a rat person.

Sometimes Remus just wanted to be with me.

I think I will miss talking to Remus the most, followed shortly by cuddling with him (though he was not always much of a cuddler), and sharing my food. Who will I share my food with now? I always give him a little tortilla in the mornings and a little bread when I make sandwiches. I always share my fruit and veggies with him and I loved it when he climbed all over me to try to get to my food.

It was so surprising that I think it will take a while to sink in. Everything was sudden and fast. I am so sad and heartbroken. The first thing I said when he was fading was, "I'm not ready." But I guess that's silly--who is ready to lose someone? I just thought I had more time with him.

I hope my boys are reunited, at least.

What I wouldn't give to share my food with him again. I miss my rats so much. Love you, little Remus.

Two Years

It's been two years (tomorrow) since I brought Romulus and Remus home.

Itty bitty ratties!

Baby Romulus!

Baby Remus!

Understandably, I still really miss Romulus. I think about him a lot and my heart still aches for him.

I'm still happy to have Remus. And we have gotten closer. We do alright on our own. But I can't help but think that we would both be happier if Romulus were still with us.

One of my very favorite pictures of them.

I'm a lot less angry now, but no less sad to have him gone. It surprises me how often he crosses my mind. The silliest little things will remind me of him. Like buying coffee. Yeah, long story.

I still have my mopey, sad moments where I sit and remember him and cry for a while. But I do try to focus my energy on good things, too. Like spending time with my Remus.

But Remus seems to be adjusted and doing well. I try to spend even more time with him. We have some fun and sometimes he will even play games with me.

I still think about getting him a friend, but I am reluctant. I have looked at a couple of male rats up for adoption, and I haven't found any that make me feel like it would work out. He really would have to be the right rat. And while I don't want Remus to be lonely, he also seems to like being the only child in many ways.

Who knows. Maybe I will find that rat, maybe not. I hope to have more rats in the future (possibly after Remus has passed on) because I love them so much. But right now, Remus and I are doing our best together! And I love the silly little guy to pieces.

Missing My Rat

Yesterday I had to put down Romulus. He got a respiratory infection, but his symptoms did not seem to indicate that. So I waited too long to bring him into the vet. We got him started on antibiotics and after several days, they weren't working, but I thought they just needed more time. So I didn't take him in until he was having severe trouble breathing (suddenly). I rushed him to the emergency room, crying and panicked. I kept him on my lap and basically refused to let go of him until someone finally came to put him into an oxygen box. That seemed to help and we added an antibiotic.

The next day he was struggling to breathe, even with the oxygen. Despite the care and drugs and oxygen, he was fading quickly. I had to make the horrible decision to put him down because I didn't want him to suffer anymore and there wasn't a chance of him getting better.

I feel like that was the right decision, even though it was a big one and I felt like I really shouldn't be the one to decide that. But it's hard. And my heart is broken.

The whole 24 hours or so seemed so surreal. I spent so much time in the ER waiting room and exam rooms and Romulus faded so, so quickly. It all happened so fast that I didn't get time to really adjust to his life ending and him being gone from my life. Usually when pets age, they decline slowly and you have time to prepare.

I put him down exactly two weeks before his second birthday. He didn't even make it to his second birthday. And that just seems horribly unfair. And I actually feel angry. I am used to my pets living a pretty long time and he should have had at least another year. So I can't help but feel that he is supposed to be here. I still expect him to be here. He was so cheerful and loving all the time, even when he wasn't feeling well (which is probably part of why I didn't realize how sick he was earlier). It is very hard for me to see my life without him. It was too sudden. And I know life isn't fair, but this seems so cruel.

To top it off, I feel horrible for Remus. He has always been with his brother. And I can tell that he is OK, but kind of mopey. I think it will be hard for him. And I feel like I should look into getting him a buddy (after some time), but he is really going to have to be the right rat. Romulus was SO easy-going and happy. Remus is sweet, but neurotic, anxious, and the dominant rat. I am pretty sure the only reason he was dominant is because Romulus let him and didn't care enough to fight for it. I would have to find a rat that would fit with him. Remus is kind of anti-social; its possible he will be OK on his own, but I don't want him to be sad and lonely.

Romulus and his little "meeps" when he was getting into trouble.

I keep expecting Romulus to be here. I miss him licking me all the time and playing with me. He was always the social one who wanted to come out and run around and be in the middle of everything. I will miss him trying to help himself to my food and drinks (Remus is too polite for that, the sweetie). I just miss him with an acute ache that makes my stomach tighten and my heart hurt. And I cry a lot. Sometimes randomly when a thought sneaks up on me. I also haven't been sleeping very well. I lay there for hours and just think about him. I feel lost without him.

 

Romulus kisses.

I'm glad I still have Remus and he still has me. I make him come out and sit and cuddle with me more (which he tolerates pretty well--he's not much of a cuddler). It's going to take a while for me to bounce back from this one. I try to keep myself distracted, otherwise I just cry all of the time. He was the best rat and he is sorely missed.