May and June 2024 Wrap Up

May and June were busy months that went by quickly.

Gabriel started daycare in May and has been going each day. Which was very hard for me at first (I cried more than he did, for sure), but has since gotten much better. Gabriel likes his daycare and we really like the people who work there.

I had my first Mother's Day and Kevin had his first Father's Day. With a human baby, I mean. Gabriel continues to grow and mostly be wonderful and happy. And continues to be very central in my life, of course.

Kevin and I got to go on a little vacation to Florida without the munchkin. We got to spend time in Harry Potter World and Disney World. It was fun and wonderful, even if it was a bit weird to be away from Gabriel.

Otherwise, Varney was neutered and I am trying to get him and Ruthven back into the same cage again (ornery rats...).

Work is... just work. I am trying to maintain a balance and not make everything my problem. But things are constantly made my problem anyway. My issue with this is that I don't receive much recognition or any compensation to go with these extra things that end up being required of me while others holding the same position I do (or even above my position) are not expected to take care of these types of things and most of them are making more than I am. I have been better at pushing back, but it isn't always possible. And it does very much depend on who is asking me for things. There are some people who I like and respect and I have a hard time saying no to them. But they also show up for me, too, so that feels more OK. But otherwise I am trying very hard to push tasks and responsibilities back to the person who should be taking care of those things. My counselor and I talk a lot about practicing radical acceptance. That I don't have to agree with things in order to accept them. And how to accept things that are not in my control. We also talk a bit about how and why I get defensive about certain things and how to work on myself to deal with those issues... Which I like less, but definitely needs to be addressed. Ultimately, I think all of these things have helped me focus more on the parts of my job that are actually my job and letting things fall apart if that is what needs to happen (which it has). And helps me maintain better balance because my career is important and I love my work, but it is definitely not my whole life nor do I want it to be.

Anyway, that was long and rambling and probably nonsensical. But I wanted to get a little bit of that out.

I have gotten a bit behind on my reading goals. Part of that is because I started listening to music again. I go through phases with music, but since I have been listening to that while I drive, I am not getting through audio books as quickly. But I have managed to keep reading and I have actually worked my way through more of my Owlcrate book backlog.

Now for some quick reviews!

 

 Titles: The House of Hades and the Blood of Olympus

by Rick Riordan

4 out of 5 stars

Re-reads

 

The Time Machine

by H.G. Wells

Synopsis/Thoughts: Classic story that I never read before. This came in an Owlcrate box from many, many years ago as a bonus book. I'm glad that I finally read it since it seems to be one of those that everyone reads. It was pretty good, though I was not immensely satisfied with the ending of the Time Traveller's time in the future. (Also, since he can time travel, I feel like he could have saved Weena. Or maybe he went to do that at the end, who knows?) Overall, I liked it, but I do tend to like dystopian stories.

Rating: 3 1/2 stars out of 5 stars

 

Title: How Not to Hate Your Husband

After Kids by Jancee Dunn, narrated by the author

Synopsis/Thoughts: Well, the books is basically what the title says it is! And this book really packed a punch. I definitely recommend it to any couple who is having or has children. I was feeling a lot of resentment towards my husband at times after Gabriel was born, though our situation was not nearly as extreme as some. And Kevin is so great about doing other household chores that baby care falling mostly to me felt more fair than some situations you hear and read about.

Seriously, read this book. I sobbed when their first therapist gave her instructions on controlling her anger (disappearing into a closet to tell a photo of her daughter that she knew what she was feeling was going to hurt her daughter but that her anger was more important right now than her daughter was. Oof.) And I laughed at the brilliancy of consulting an expert in de-escalating hostage situations to teach her husband how to deal with her when she was on a rampage. So many things made so much more sense when I read this. And I laughed and cried and got angry and felt happy all in turns.

Rating: 5 stars out of 5 stars

Title: A Lady for a Duke by Alexis Hall

Narrator: Kay Eluvian

Synopsis/Thoughts: During the war in Waterloo, Viola is assumed to be dead, but she survived and used the news to live her life as herself for once, even at the cost of her wealth, status, and friends. Including the Duke of Gracewood who was her closest companion in the days before her disappearance. Fate, of course, brings them back together as Viola helps Gracewood heal and Gracewood learns who Viola is all over again. Overall, I enjoyed this story. While I didn't love everything, many parts were very sweet and surprising and nice. 

Rating: 3 stars out of 5 stars

 

Title: Crier's War by Nina Varela

Synopsis/Thoughts: This is an old Owlcrate book and felt appropriate to read in June. Once, humans created Automae to be pets and playthings of the wealthy until the Automae revolted and took over and forced humans to serve them. Lady Crier is an Automae, designed and built at the request of her father, the Sovereign. Ayla is her human maid servant who dreams of avenging the death of her family by destroying the Sovereign and his family. Until Crier and Ayla begin to fall in love and learn that maybe there are other ways to live. This book was a good read and I really liked the interactions between Crier and Ayla as they learned more about one another. I think I would like to finish the duology to see how their story pans out.

Rating: 3 stars out of 5 stars

 

Title: Boyfriend Material by Alexis Hall

Narrator: Joe Jameson

Rating: 5 stars out of 5 stars

Re-read. I just love this book and the voice and humor of the story.

 

Title: Song of the Six Realms by

Judy I. Lin

Synopsis/Thoughts: Xue is a very talented qin player, but she is a nobody. Until she captures the eye of Duke Meng when he hears her play. He makes an offer she can't refuse: to come play for him in exchange for her freedom. Upon arriving at Duke Meng's estate, she discovers there is much more to him and to his home than first meets the eye. And the Duke needs her help. This was a recent Owlcrate book and I participated in the read-a-long on the Nest app. I really enjoyed this book, maybe more than I thought I would. There were a few times I cried, mostly about Xue's uncle. It was a lovely story and many of the characters were really wonderful and interesting.

Rating: 4 1/2 stars out of 5 stars 

Title: Stay Gold by Tobly McSmith

Narrators: Theo Germaine and Phoebe Strole

Rating: 5 stars out of 5 stars

Re-read. I just love this book so much. I finished it and wanted to turn around and read it all over again.

Title: Love Without Sex by

Sophie Lucido Johnson, narrated 

by the author

Synopsis/Thoughts: This is a look at different and modern relationships. Not just romantic relationships, but about friendships and chosen family as well. I feel like there was a lot to unpack here and it was a very interesting and informative read. I know that some of the lifestyles discussed are not for me, but it is interesting to see how people think and feel and make different things work. A couple of things resonated with me, especially the idea of community living with chosen family. As someone who is lucky enough to have friends who are family, this was interesting and appealing to me.

Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars

Favorite book read in May/June: Stay Gold. Or Boyfriend Material. I can't help it, I love them so much.

Least favorite book read in May/June: I suppose Crier's War or A Lady for a Duke, since I rated them a bit lower.

I have now read 33 books towards my goal of 75 books. Goodreads estimates that I am 4 books behind schedule. I am trying to find shorter books that I've been wanting to read that may help me catch up. I also have been trying to participate in more Owlcrate Nest read-a-longs. They are a good way to really keep me on track and set goals for each day. But there isn't much pressure and feels encouraging instead of daunting. Maybe that will help me catch up, too.

Road to Parenthood

I wasn't sure when I wanted to share this post, but Mother's Day seemed appropriate.

I wanted to share this because it was a big deal for us. I alluded to some of this about a year ago, but wasn't up to sharing yet.

Our close friends and family know, but I will share with everyone now that it is all in the rear-view mirror for us.

We were having difficulty conceiving. It was very discouraging and frustrating. I think it made me a little depressed for a while there. (That is actually why I was listening to Boyfriend Material ad nauseam last year; I found it funny, light, and comforting so I just kept re-listening to it over and over and over.) After a some time, we were referred to a fertility clinic in our area.

We had some testing done and I had to go through some procedures to see if any issues could be identified (nothing obvious was found). In the end, we had an IUI (inter-uterine insemination) done. We are some of the lucky ones because that procedure worked for us and worked the first time. We didn't get a solid answer as to why we were unable to conceive on our own, but top suspect was the normal timing of my cycles. I had long cycles, but my ovulation came late in my cycles and may not have been giving my body enough time for an embryo to implant before menstruation started. Sorry if that is TMI, but I wanted to share for others who may have a similar problem.

I wasn't ready to talk about all of this until we made it through. I guess I felt like I might jinx it.

But I knew that I wanted to share because it was difficult and isolating. I think a lot of people who go through these things feel like they are alone in their journey. And that just isn't true. There are so many people who need to use fertility services for one reason or another. It seems like everything online is meant to look picture perfect, like no one has problems like this, but that isn't real. So if there is anyone reading this who has gone through or is going through something similar, know that you aren't alone. And just because people don't talk about it doesn't mean it isn't happening.

I was lucky. While I felt really discouraged and down for many months, I had good support from family and friends (some of whom had or were having similar experiences). That helped me a lot, to have all of that love and support. I know not everyone has that, either. Which makes it even more important (in my opinion) to share these stories and provide support and maybe some hope.

Thank you for letting me share. And know that I am here if anyone is going through this and would like someone to talk to.

Gabriel ~1 week old in the first onesie we were given. It came from the fertility clinic we were at once we had confirmed pregnancy.

March and April 2024 Wrap Up

Hello and welcome back to my (hopefully) regularly scheduled blog posts.

Some little updates.

Parenthood has continued and is challenging but can also be lovely. Gabriel has the best smiles and giggles and he makes the cutest noises and I can never get enough. However, getting anything done is difficult. Once he is resting or entertaining himself, I need to do dishes or laundry or take care of the pets or shower or any number of things. It never ends, but Gabriel is worth it.

I had to return to work in March. That was difficult. I wasn't as upset about leaving Gabriel home as I thought I might be. It is hardest to say goodbye in the mornings, but once I am at work it all just feels like it did before. I'm not sure if that is good or bad. Part of it is that Kevin is home with him for a couple months so I know I don't need to worry about him. Once Gabriel is in daycare I imagine that will change.

But anyway, work has been... interesting. And not in good ways. Some changes were made while I was out that put me in a not-so-nice position. It is frustrating because I actually love my job, but the favoritism in my department is so extreme. It is insane. A couple of things did change for the better and I was so happy to see my work friends again. I actually work with a lot of neat people who I really enjoy. But I am not going to hold my breath on things getting better. I am trying to make sure that I don't overwork myself like I used to, since it doesn't result in any rewards or appreciation. It has actually been nice taking that step back. And I have only been working my regular 40 hour weeks and trying to focus my energy on things that are more important to me.

I do get to go on a little vacation soon without Gabriel. I am looking forward to it, but I also know that I am going to miss him like crazy!

I think that covers most of what is going on these days. So here are the books I read in March and April.

 

Title: The Son of Neptune by 

Rick Riordan

4 stars out of 5 stars

Re-read

Titles: Dragonwatch, Wrath of the Dragon King, Master of the Phantom Isle, 

Champion of the Titan Games, and Return of the Dragon Slayers 

by Brandon Mull

Synopsis/Thoughts: This series follows the Fablehaven series. I had actually read the first three books a few years ago, but never finished the series. And I didn't remember it well, so I started from the beginning. After the demons have been moved to their new realm, the dragons begin to rise and turn the table on the humans, wizards, and other people who wished them confined to sanctuaries. Kendra and Seth are called on to help by becoming caretakers of a dragon sanctuary and later joining in the war against the dragon king. Many things converge and many adventures are had. I love the Fablehaven series and I really enjoyed these, too They are a very magical story, but still take place in our world. I liked seeing Kendra and Seth developing more and stepping into their powers and having such a big role to play. It was nice to see old favorite characters return and go back into this world.

4 stars out of 5 stars 

 

 Title: Heartless Hunter

by Kristen Ciccarelli

Synopsis/Thoughts: This is a sort of Scarlett Pimpernel story (and yes, I had to look up what that was). In case you don't know, the Scarlett Pimpernel is a hero rescuing aristocrats sentenced to death during the French Revolution. But he leads a double life as a wealthy, but generally worthless gentleman and in secret is resourceful and quick thinking. In this story we have the Crimson Moth who is saving witches from being put to death by the new regime. Some of the officers (including high ranking officer Gideon) of the new regime suspect that she is hiding in plain sight. Rune plays the part of a shallow, flirtatious, and patriotic lady, but is secretly a witch helping to set other witches free. When she becomes a suspect, Gideon pretends to court her to find her secrets. Rune, knowing she is a suspect, pretends to let him. Until it stops feeling like pretend. There are a lot of layers and little things going on in this story and it kept me guessing and surprised me. I really, really loved reading this book and I am looking forward to the next book. I think I read that it was going to be a duology. This was an Owlcrate book and I participated in the read-a-long, but kept getting ahead because I couldn't put it down.

4 1/2 stars out of 5 stars

Title: The King's Men

by Nora Sakavic

4 out of 5 stars

Re-read 

 

 Title: The Sunshine Court

by Nora Sakavic

Synopsis/Thoughts: This is the first book in a duology (I think) and the fourth book of the All for the Game series. The story picks up from the time Jean was rescued from the Nest by Renee and how he transfers to USC and starts to recover from his experiences. I actually enjoyed this book more than I thought I would. I was originally so invested in the characters in the first three books that I wasn't sure that I would be as interested in these. But I really liked Jeremy, Cat, and Laila. And I was really rooting for Jean. I am excited for the next book, whenever that will come out.

Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars

Title: The Mark of Athena

by Rick Riordan

Rating: 4 stars out of 5 stars

Re-read

I'm not sure if I had a favorite read this month. I really enjoyed the Heartless Hunter and the Sunshine Court.

I have now read 23 books towards my goal of 75 books. I'm a bit behind according to Goodreads, but I hope I will pick up soon. I especially need to work on reading my Owlcrate books. My slow progress there sometimes frustrates me and I need to find a way to make a better effort. It would be helpful if I stopped re-reading books, I think.

Oh well. Thanks for reading. Until next time!